Baking

The world is on fire and beyond heavy. Frankly, it’s infuriating and overwhelmingly hard. So instead of dumping out what’s in my brain, I’m going to write about my love of baking. Baking is a go to anxiety reliever for me and a way to prioritize me time on a regular basis. It should surprise you in no way, therefore, that I bake A LOT.

On January 27, 2009, I wrote this in a Facebook note (remember those? lol): “I love to bake. I have a secret dream to just bake cookies and pies all day and sell them to people…I can give away a lot of what I make. I think baked goods make people happy.” I’m proud of 2009 Mary. She was on to something. Over 11 years later, I have no plans to sell baked goods, mostly because to achieve success as a baker, you generally have to be up at 3-4am and that’s not my jam. However, I’ve made it a huge hobby to give away baked goods as often as possible.

Let’s rewind a bit though and talk about why baking helps with anxiety, at least for me. First, it’s chemistry, delicious, chocolatey, chemistry. As someone who loves definitive answers and exacting behavior, baking feeds my desire to make things “right”. If I combine the exact amount of ingredients at exactly the right time, the chemicals do their thing and magic happens. I find so much calm in knowing the predictability of tried and true recipes. I can make chocolate chip cookies without a recipe at this point because I know the exact proportions and exactly when to mix everything together. It is my type A, want to control all the things, dream. Having controlling tendencies can get real unhealthy real quick, but channelling that desire into baking feels like a healthy way to use my tendencies for good.

Second, baking is love. Seeing the joy on someone’s face when they taste something delicious is practically perfect in every way (comment below with the reference and I’ll give you a chocolate chip cookie ;). My new favorite activity after baking a bunch of goodies is randomly dropping them off on people’s porches and texting to let them know treats are waiting for them. They get a yummy surprise and I get the joy of sharing what I love with other people.

Side note: if anyone ever tells you that giving to others is selfless, they might be lying to you. At least for me, I love to give to others or volunteer to be helpful because I get a gigantic sense of satisfaction knowing that something I did had a positive impact on someone else. It’s selfish, but it’s a kind of selfish I can hang with. I get weirded out when people praise each other and give each other prizes for doing kind things for others because isn’t that what we are supposed to do anyway? It’s kind of like a participation trophy for being good to others. I think we would all be better off if we found our kindness lane and gave whatever we could whenever we could without expectation of a pat on the back from others.

I didn’t expect to get on my soap box there but sometimes the words come out and I’m sticking with it. Maybe it’s baking, maybe it’s donating your time or your money, whatever it might be, I know we would all be more satisfied people who also help others a ton if we just gave a little more. But back to the anxiety relief. Watching something go from 8 or 9 ingredients that don’t taste great on their own (expect chocolate, chocolate tastes delicious in any form. Except white chocolate. That’s straight trash.) to something yummy and full of flavor is such a lovely way to channel my stresses and anxieties into an esteemable act that brings me joy.

Yay for baking! Happy Wednesday, and if no one has told you how loved you are today, please know that you are loved so very much.